How to lose Tyler in 10 days

Being single for 10 years after your mission is one of the best ways to leave a big wake of babes through the waters of dating...the kind of wake that is big enough to do all kinds of tricks (like a wake boarder). But most of the fun I've had riding in these waters has involved wiping out! When I say I've thrown out a big wake of babes over the years, it's not something I'm proud of; it's more something that I try to laugh about and share with others so I don't repeat my same mistakes.

One girl back in my Weber State days had definitely not seen the movie, "How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days". After one date, I decided I wasn't really interested, despite her extreme good looks. She decided the opposite. She did everything possible to spend time with me from that time forward. Because my house was conveniently located closer to campus than most Weber State parking lots, she conveniently stopped by with her lunch that she needed to put in my fridge, came over between classes, and surprisingly fell asleep on my couch in hopes that I would come home from work to find her asleep. After telling her it would never work out between the two of us, she persisted. Upon arriving home from work one day, I found her doing the dishes in my kitchen (in a very leave-it-beaver 1950's manner) where she nurturingly asked me how my day was. Yikes! Was this girl my live-in wife without benefits? After cleaning out my fridge, making me brownies, chancing in upon my guitar lessons, and scrubbing my kitchen floor didn't work in 'wooing' me, she tried more extreme measures. Because I had long-since stopped answering her phone calls, she called me from my home phone (yeah, this dates back to the last time I had a land line). Thinking it was my brother calling from my own house, of course I answered. This was the last straw. I had to tell this girl to, please, quell her false hopes!

Once we were on the same page, the phone calls stopped, but her efforts were still strong. At the end of the semester, she decided that she would come on an open-invite group ski trip that I was in charge of. On the first run of the trip, my would-not-be girlfriend severely broke her collar bone. AHH! Being the only person she really knew on the trip, I was left in the position to baby-sit her, administer her pain meds, and to cater to her nausea. At the end of the trip, I over heard this girl mention to another that her and I had not yet kissed only because we had the temple in out sites!!

Well, that is a great way to lose Tyler in 10 days. All these tricks are good in the following situations: never or if I'm a 21-year-old dilly bar in Liberty Square in Provo.

Upcoming: Tales of Alice, Stacey, and Holly